tlaero wrote:The writing is good, and I'm glad you finally got a game with cum shots, even if you needed to write it to make that happen.
The mechanics of the game are a little iffy, though. It desperately needs a save game, especially since it has a random element. If it weren't a game you'd written, I'd have given up when I went 3 games in a row where my first two slots were losses. I think you should probably remove the slots entirely. They keep people from finding the correct path.
As for paths, you're kind of stumbling around in the dark. There's little indication which option is the right one and which isn't, so you basically need to keep trying, failing, and restarting. It doesn't feel to me like you could "play well" and choose the right path. You've got to do it by process of elimination. Without a save, that's a pain. In my games I try to make it so if you get in the right mindset, which choice is correct is clear. I don't think that happens here. Take the drug dealer. "You have the right to remain silent" vs "You've got a guy on the take?" Is there anything anywhere that you could have seen or read that would make it clear that one choice is an insta-death and guides you to make the right one?
I'm also not a fan of there being so many items in the game that aren't used. With the above mentioned lack of feedback, the unused item make you think there's more to do, so you spend a lot of time searching futilely for content that doesn't exist.
It's a good first effort, though.
Tlaero
Thanks Tlaero, I'm really glad you played it. I thought about you a lot while I was writing it, very nervously. Because of your preference for writing female characters with strong character, I was worried you would be offended at my characterization of strippers, and at how the Player's dialogue choices show some disrespect toward them. I assure you that in my other games I won't be so much like that, I guess I just felt like the subject matter was sleazy, so sleazy characters with a sleazy attitude worked in this game.
I agree that the slots were a mistake. I think the low ratings on PF1 are due in part, maybe in large part, to people getting frustrated at the slots and then giving it a zero. I may never include a random element in a game I make ever again but if I did, I would make sure to include a save point.
I see what you mean about there being no clear path. It was commented on above by redle too and I addressed that in my response to his post. Seems obvious in hindsight - but live and learn, I won't make that mistake again.
And regarding the cubicle and condom machine, and other useless items: Yeah, sorry about that . The condoms were going to be necessary for one of the endings at one point, but it was getting too complicated and so i took that out but left them condoms in. Next time I will make sure to remove any items if I remove their purpose. Same with the toilet stall,
Obviously this was way too hard and complicated, so I eliminated it, but left the stall. Again, I have learned now that it's important not to include anything that has no purpose.
Thanks again for playing it and for your comments. I'm excited to see what you think about my LOPGold game, Living with Temptation, that should be released sometime this month. It suffers from fewer of these problems I think, and the path is clear right from the start because it's a sim game like Living with Britney - just figure out the best way to build your stats quickly to unlock scenes. But when play testing, I'll have these comments in mind.
Best regards, iksanabot