Aaron's life

[Dakutis]

Hi to all. I am new there and it is my first game. I very like Getting to Know Christine game, and after I play it I decided to make my game.

Full version you can download from my Website.

[Super]

=D Yay, someone else is finally doing another game using tlaero's engine! I would do some, but my artistic skills SUCK. Making things look sexy is beyond my capacity. Can write it though >_>

Anyway, I like writing, so I'd be glad to help edit your demo.

[wagner]

It sounds like you're trying to write the game by hand, reusing the code from Christine. You may want to read this thread, if you haven't seen it before.

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=2076

[Dakutis]

It sounds like you're trying to write the game by hand, reusing the code from Christine. You may want to read this thread, if you haven't seen it before.

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=2076

Yes I read this thread. Now I converted all files to new version of program. Now I'm working on the scripts, I want to install a few things to make the game more interesting.

[cheese101]

I could betatest grammar and spelling,but am not gifted in the arts in any form, so writing/drawing good stories is well out of my reach :P
but if that suits I will help

[SYH]

I'll help with the editing too.

[Dakutis]

Superawesomemans, cheese101, SYH - tomorrow I send you link with demo, you'll be the first beta testers. And after few days you all will be able to try the demo.

[seprium]

Great to hear Dakutis,

i'm looking forward to your new game!!

[Henrik]

be happy to help with any editing or text work as well.

[Dakutis]

One beta tester wanted to work with the dialogues, so you can try the demo later, as we're done with the dialogues.

[Super]

That beta tester would be me. Anyway, I'm currently uploading the thing and will send it to Dakutis so he can make any last minute changes or whatever he wants. So the demo should be up... relatively soon.

[Dakutis]

Demo released, we are waiting for your comments. Write what do you think please, maybe something need to change or something is missing.

[Dole]

Demo released, we are waiting for your comments. Write what do you think please, maybe something need to change or something is missing.

I play the Demo and I found these bugs (play with Firefox):

At the beginning with Mia

"Well, why we are standing at the door? ..."

("r" is missing)

I think it was at Lilys home.

[Lily:] "Oh well aren´t you nice ..."

("l" is missing)

I don´t know why you have 3 Greetings to the first time you meet Dirk,Lily and Mia. When in the Game there is a different please make a real different Greeting from it (Say Hello with a "smirk". Give a light kiss to Mia. Shake hands first with Dirk then Mia and last Lily and so on a real different Choise).

[sylakone2]

Hi Dakutis
It is coming along. Not bad for a first attempt.

Sy

[ExLibris]

This is probably just me nitpicking, but home old is Mia intended to be? The introduction states that the PC is 25 years old and that Mia was his childhood friend, which suggests they're of similar ages. However, the introduction also implies that Mia has just started college a few months ago, which would suggest that she's at least five years younger than the PC and makes it a little implausible that they were childhood friends. There are a lot of ways to write around that, but it just struck me as odd.

Gameplay-wise, it felt like there weren't enough decision-points during the game. The player spends most of their time just clicking through each scene, and where there is a choice of options it's usually obvious which is the best one. Also, the gym shower scene seemed very familiar... except that in this case there's no obvious reason why Lily would come into the men's showers to catch the PC.

In terms of formatting, I'm not a huge fan of listing the name of the speaker before they say anything (eg. [Mia:] "I'm going to) as though it was the script of a play. Generally it should be obvious from the context and the dialogue itself who is speaking. If it isn't, you can just add "she says" or "he says" at the end, which also gives you an opportunity to describe how they're saying something if you want (eg. "she says nervously"). You could also colour code the dialogue by speaker to make it stand out more.

I've PM'd you a list of typos, but the whole thing should probably be properly proof-read. I find that it's easiest to concatenate the individual html files into one single document.

A promising start though. Looking forward to how it turns out.